"... to love without any ulterior motive, loving God and loving goodness because it is good to do so: not for going to heaven, or got get wealth or anything else. God Himself is love. So long as you see a person love another to get something, you may know that it is not true love; it is shopkeeping. Love is always the giver, never the taker. The nature of real love is that it does not ask for anything in return. Love knows no fear. Where do you ever see love in fear?"-- Pathways to Joy
Loving a child, parent or sibling is like this. Sometimes, in the case of a child, all they have to do is smile and all the other hurts or behaviors that they have just done melt away. With a partner, that love is harder- that relationship is a circle of respect that shows love and love that shows respect. When the circle is broken, to continue to love without condition is difficult. However, I believe it is a choice. We chose our path, we chose our mates, we chose to live a life that's positive, or we dwell in mud puddle of the negative. We have a choice.