NYC: a portrait

There is shadow and light in all of us. Having dealt with the depths of the shadow now for longer than I care to admit, I'm grateful to not only discern the light in myself but begin to appreciate both sides of me. I don't want to remove the sorrows or shortcomings. I hope that they serve to shape and mold me into that stronger, wiser person that's already inside me. 


One of the most played artists on my ipod, James Vincent McMorrow, is featured in this engrossing video of New York City. Listening to this album non-stop on a trip to NYC this past winter, it quickly became my anthem for the spirit of the city and and with repetition became ingrained into the soundtrack that revealed the light and darkness within my soul. 

Hearing it now floods the movie screen of my mind with emotions. I experienced a life-changing therapeutics (a 5 day immersion), roomed with an arresting and brave 20 year old dutch girl in a youth hostel, found redeeming love and forgiveness with a high school sweetheart. Wounds healed and new bonds of friendships constructed out of complete surrender. 

When I can realistically acknowledge my failings and not dwell on them but instead allow them to propel me forward to my greater purpose or dharma, I feel freedom. To grow in the midst of pain, as a friend reminded me, is like finding treasure in the most unexpected places.

"Everything can change in a moment; we have little control over the outer weather patterns as we make our way through the landscape of a life. But we can become masters of the inner landscape."--Elizabeth Lesser